breaking news!!! breaking lamps. breaking everything. i’m so fucking clumsy
The Rules of Social Anxiety
1. Walk with eyes fixed on the ground
They are watching, laughing, judging
Don’t focus on it too much or you will stumble and be made a fool of
2. Look like you are writing and busy in class
avoid being called on
you know the answer but what if you stutter or mumble
What if they tell you “speak up I can’t hear you”
3. Don’t make a noise
hold in that cough that sneeze that breathe
people will hear you
do not draw attention to yourself like that
4. Spend time every night before you go to bed to think
Think about all the embarrassing things you have ever done
Everyone remembers, that’s all they remember
5. Never enter a room full of people
They all look
Why are you here?
Why are you alive?
6. Your friends all secretly hate you
you know why they didn’t reply to your text
you know how they all dread seeing you
you are only put up with because of pity
7. Always be scared
Scared to sit next to a stranger
Scared to see someone you know
Scared eat in front of people
Scared to talk on the phone
Scared to go to social events
Scared order at a restaurant
Scared to talk
Scared to have a panic attack
Scared to be noticed
but don’t worry,
you don’t like people anyway,
at least that’s what you say,
You don’t even care what they think, people are annoying,
that’s what you tell them.
You play it off as a joke
but really you’re always scared.
that last gif melts my heart
dean is actually so much less smooth than sam
I love when people randomly follow me because I assume they’ve just seen something I said and went “ah yes. This nerd seems particularly strange. Let’s see what else it does”
Tribute to Steve Irwin, a guy who genuinely loved nature and animals.
This man was beyond real
"Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you. People are harder. Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first."
- Steve Irwin (r.i.p.)
don’t underestimate my ability to perform a whole musical if left home alone
THIS WAS LITERALLY THE BEST COMIC I HAVE EVER HAD THE SINCEREST PLEASURE TO READ.
complete panic in one screenshot
he just accepts it, not even surprised by it. must happen all the time
a baguette in the butt would be a pain in the ass
My boyfriend Cliff works from home, but our kitten Simon insists on being held multiple times throughout the day. This was impacting Cliff’s ability to get work done so we had to fashion a kitten sling so that Simon could get his snuggles in and Cliff could work
"ur such a qt"
am I calling you cute?
or am I calling you a quentin tarantino?
you’ll never know